Consciousness Explained, part 3:
Our Reality Creation in a Conscious Universe

Warning: This text is heavy duty and might be incomprehensible or dangerous to your current paradigm. Image: Green art nouveau laurel wreath.

This is part 3 of a long and concentrated (but easy to read) text on consciousness and reality. You can find the first part here: part 1 and the second part here: part 2.

These texts have fairly advanced content. The subjects and concepts are pretty mind-boggling, so these texts are mostly for people who are serious about understanding themselves, the world, life, the universe and everything. These texts are for you if you choose to put conscious awareness first and you don’t care if you have to tear down your present world view to get closer to the truth of how things really are. Yep. Warning complete. Next, please have fun with this last part of the article trilogy:

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In parts one and two I presented the same (following) seven points, and at the risk of seeming repetitive I will do so again here, for the third time (with links to the relevant spots):

Seven Good-to-Know Things about Reality and Consciousness

1. Physical reality isn’t

2. Consciousness is everything, everywhere, at all times, in all dimensions

3. Consciousness is primary (the creator), physical stuff is secondary (the created)

4. Consciousness is multi-layered, multi-dimensional and multi-creative with infinite potential

5. Realities = that which is experienced

6. Consciousness = reality (that-which-is) AND infinite realities (plural)

7. We can change our reality and (life) experience by choice

In other words, in parts 1 and 2 of this article trilogy we’ve looked at the not-very-real (virtual) nature of both physical reality and of what we think of as our daily reality; we’ve seen that everything is actually consciousness, including ourselves; and we know that as multi-layered, multi-dimensional and multi-creative consciousness we humans can (and do) create our own relative reality for ourselves to experience – or share. And we know the difference between these countless personal, relative realities and absolute reality.

Now, it’s time to look at the final point, namely point 7.

(7.) We Can Change Our Reality and (Life) Experience by Choice

So, finally, we come to the seventh and last point. In some ways it’s the most interesting one. It’s also the one to which I will devote the most words and explanations. (Yep, it’s going to be a looong text, less like an article and more like a small book, really). Why?

Well, partly because reality creation and how you create your own reality (and life experience) is a huge and utterly cool subject, but also because it’s so very important for our (YOUR) personal life experience. It’s definitely worth investing some extra time, attention and energy in – both for you and for me.

The Game (or Process) of Living Life on Earth

The physical world is virtual, remember (from part 1)? Very much like a game of virtual reality – taking place inside of consciousness.

Well, I’m writing this and you’re reading it, so we’re here, each in a physical body. Inside the game of physical virtual reality called “life on planet Earth”.

If you don’t like the word “game” we can also call it a process – we’re participating in a process of virtual reality as Earther humans.

I call this process “the choose-create-experience-grow game of living life“. It is the basis for reality creation. It’s how you create your own reality, your own life experience.

As you can see, there are four main subjects in this process/game: choosing, creating, experiencing and growing. They aren’t so much steps as they’re parts, because as we shall see later, they’re not quite sequential.

All of us humans already master this game/process of inventing reality, we already create our own reality, only we’re generally not aware of it, because it happens subconsciously and superconsciously.

In fact, we’re typically not even aware that we’re participating in a game/process and that we’ve created our own virtual reality and life experience … we think it’s all given (not created) and real (not virtual). The fact that it’s all virtual and that we’re in control of all of it has completely slipped our minds.

Please feel free to take a moment where you consider whatever it is you call reality. What is reality to you?

What is reality to you? Image: A female face superimposed on a warped photo of the stars.

Odds are that “reality” to you is the physical world including your physical body and your ego.

Well. Are you aware that those things are actually virtual? Are you aware that you’re inventing reality, creating your own reality? Are you aware that you’re completely in charge of creating your own life experience? Do you know how? Can you do it consciously?

Yes? No? (If you’ve read the two previous parts of this article trilogy you might answer yes to some of those questions, but for most people a “no” to several of those questions is the most likely answer).

The trick, then, is to get more conscious. And helping you make yourself more conscious is in fact the purpose of this article trilogy.

Our Much-played Sub-Games (Drama Games)

This virtual consciousness game of life on Earth is quite complex, and we can focus on any number of other things than experiencing, too. In fact, there are complex sub-games inside of the game, and inside of those sub-games there are smaller but still complex sub-sub-games, too.

I sometimes call these sub-games drama games, because of all the drama they tend to cause for those playing them. But hey, that just might be the main reason why people choose to play them: for the drama.

Just so you know what I’m talking about, here are a couple of our favorite drama games a.k.a. sub-games of the game of living life on planet Earth:

– The physical body game, with the sub-sub-games of having some skin color or another, and some gender or another, as well as “being beautiful”, “being ugly”, “being fat”, “being skinny”, or being whatever else you can think of that has to do with physical bodies

– The relationship game with sub-sub-games that have to do with e.g. friendship, being single, dating, living together (cohabitation), being soulmates, being codependent, being married, being divorced, being in a relationship that’s monogamous, or open, or polyamorous or whatever

Those are just examples. There are lots of other sub-games/drama games, each with their own collections of sub-sub-games, like for example: the money game, the career game, the power game, the identity game, the religion game, the family game, the material possessions game, the morality game, the knowledge game, the fame game … the list goes on and on. (Here’s a link if you want to read in-depth about drama games).

How do you know if someone is playing a drama game (including you yourself)? The three most obvious signs are:

a) the importance they assign to the subject
b) the resources they spend on the subject
c) the drama the subject causes for them

Since these games are all consciousness games, the resources we spend on them are mostly “consciousness resources” like attention, intention, energy and time, but we typically also spend money on them, too.

Obviously, if you spend these resources on playing sub-games (drama games), then those resources won’t be available for other things.

Here’s the main point:

We don’t have to play ANY sub-games / drama games at all. We can let them all go.

By dropping the drama games we free a lot of consciousness resources like attention, time, energy and awareness (and perhaps money, too) that we can use however we like. To love, create, explore, experiment, learn, develop, grow, help others or whatever we feel like.

Including the most important focus of all: creating the life experience we prefer.

It is entirely possible to simply decide what your preference in each of the (game) areas is, and consciously design your life accordingly, with little or no drama.

For example, you can be a beautiful, fat, multi-cultural, non-religious, pansexual, powerful, self employed, genderfluid person in several polyamorous relationships … with no drama what so ever. It’s quite possible. And all up to you.

We don't have to play ANY drama games at all. Image: two borders of theater masks.

Living Life and Creating Reality (Playing the Game): What’s the Point?

There’s a point to this process, a reason why we’re playing this game of living life on Earth and creating our own reality. Actually, there may be several reasons (like learning, growing, playing, creating, expressing, etc.), but one of the most important ones is this: the fact that we’re experiencing … pretty much all the time, even when we’re asleep and dreaming.

This is notable, because while the game has four parts (choose, create, experience and grow), we’re not choosing, creating or growing ALL the time, but we ARE experiencing almost all the time. Ergo:

It’s All about Experiencing

So, the way I see it:

The game of existing is all about experiencing. We’re consciousness experiencing itself.

As is everything else. Yep, everything … everything we see (like animals, plants, the planet Earth, the sun and the stars), and everything we cannot see (some of which we can encounter on, say, inner journeys in consciousness, if we want … where we can also experience actually being an animal, a tree, a mountain, the planet Earth, etc.).

It’s ALL consciousness, it’s all conscious to some degree, and it’s all experiencing in some form. It is a conscious universe, a constantly experiencing universe.

In other words:

Life is consciousness, but life is about existing and experiencing.

In short:

Living = experiencing. In fact: Existing = experiencing.


Existing and living life is about experiencing.

This is a profound and extremely important realization.

Life is consciousness, but life is about existing and experiencing. Image: man in front of a a waterfall that creates rainbows in the sun.

Where Experience Happens

You do realize where your experience takes place, right?

If you go to Maui, Malawi or the Moon, your experience isn’t taking place in those places.

Your experience is always happening inside you – in your consciousness.

You and I can visit the same place, live in the same hotel room and do the exact same things while we’re there, but we’re NOT going to have the same experience. They might be similar, but they’re not the same, because you’ll have your experience – inside of you, and I’ll have my experience – inside of me. And …

Who Has the Power?

Who controls what happens inside your own consciousness?

Let's let it all be and focus on our experience. Image: an old flower frame.

You do. Not me, not your lover, or your parents, or your boss, or the president / prime minister / king / dictator of your country. You. Only you. You have the power.

You have ALL of the power over your own experience.

Things happen. They do, that’s part of the game. But who decides what to make of them, who gets to interpret (or refrain from interpreting them)? You do.

One day it rains, the next day the sun shines. Is that good? Bad? It’s neither. It just IS. You decide what to make of it, if anything. The funny thing is …

Our life experience gets better the more we allow things and people (including ourselves) to just BE without interpreting or judging them.

Our attention, energy and other resources are much, much better spent focusing on having the experience we want.

Let’s look at how to do that.

Reality Creation: The Process (The Game)

Just to make sure we’re clear on the main fact, here’s how the game works:

You choose something, you create that something, you experience what you’ve created, and all along the way you also have the chance to learn and grow (expand).

That’s it. That’s the simple formula or process of reality creation that rules most of your life experience, perhaps all of your life experience. It is, in a way, a description of life as human being.

Since I am a big advocate of living life consciously and playfully my choice is, as mentioned, to call this process “playing the choose-create-experience-grow game of living life“.

Playing the choose-create-experience-grow game of living life (reality creation). Image: Picture frame created with old art nouveau flower tiles.

We’re all doing this, we’re all playing this game / participating in this process. It’s the built in default in the “living life on Earth” experience.

Even though it isn’t, the process seems quite automatic – it certainly happens whether we are aware of it or not.

The reason it isn’t actually fully automatic is because our subconscious and superconscious do seem to be highly involved in it.

(By superconscious I do not so much mean our collective unconscious as I mean the more conscious levels of ourselves (our “higher consciousness“), even if the borders between the two are unclear and probably fluent, too).

The trick is making the game / process more conscious.

Ergo, we need to look a bit more closely at the four parts of the game: the choosing, the creating, the experiencing and the growing.

What You Need to Know about GROWING

Growth pretty much equals expansion. The physical universe is expanding at an incredible rate and other parts of life, including e.g plants, animals and us humans are growing, too – with regards to size, skills, knowledge and understanding, various types of capacity and in terms of self image or identity, too.

Some schools of thought adhere to the idea that the Earth experience (the game) is all about learning and growing. I do not quite agree. I do see growth as an integral part of the game, but it’s not the most important part.

(For example, I have known some people here on Earth who behaved in a remarkably stagnant manner. They rarely made conscious decisions, nor exercised their creativity, and they clearly weren’t growing much as human beings, but never the less they were experiencing all the time – as do we all).

Growing equals change. Image: small green sprout coming up through asphalt.

Growth = expansion = change. Which tends to mean getting out of our comfort zone, because that’s where we learn and grow the most. But a lot of people don’t like change and they certainly don’t like leaving their comfort zone.

We know what we’ve got, right, we don’t know what we’re going to get. Who knows, it might be worse than what we have. Even if experience and common sense both tell us that expanding and growing typically means getting better: We ourselves get better, and our life experience gets better, too.

There are many other ways to grow, of course, including the ones mentioned above (size, skills, knowledge and understanding, various types of capacity, identity, etc.). The thing to remember, though, is that …

We humans are consciousness, so the most important type of growth there is for us is getting more conscious – expanding our consciousness, expanding our conscious awareness.

What does that mean? Well, other expressions that cover the same thing are “raising our consciousness”, “achieving higher states of awareness”, “spiritual development”, “becoming more present in the now”, “expanding our identity” or “raising our energetic vibration”. And it is all those things, yes, but to me expanding your conscious awareness primarily has to do with this:

Gaining more conscious awareness, expanding (“raising”) our consciousness is simply getting closer to the actual truth – a.k.a. absolute reality – a.k.a. that-which-is.

Getting closer in terms of understanding the truth, trusting the truth, basing our state of being on the truth and experiencing the truth in our lives.

Incidentally …

The more conscious awareness we have, the more expanded (“higher”) our consciousness (a.k.a. the closer we are to the truth of that-which-is), the better our life experience.

Since we’ve all been force fed (indoctrinated with) a lot of misunderstandings as we grew up … and have created our own, new and interesting misunderstandings as well … the primary way to raise our consciousness, at first, is to let go.

The more misunderstandings (untruths, typically in the form of old hurts, beliefs, mindsets, habits/traditions, etc.) we let go, the more consciously aware we get, and the better our lives become.

Expanding our conscious awareness and getting closer to that-which-is (a.ka. absolute reality) is what it's all about. Image: sunset over a lake, silhouette of a tree in the lake.

What You Need to Know about CHOOSING

Like I said, since we’re all making thousands of choices every day (the number 35,000 choices per day per adult is often mentioned, including in e.g. this article about choice making), so we’re really choice making experts. We generally have NO problem what so ever choosing. Sometimes, though, we do.

Regarding choice making here are a dozen of my best pieces of advice to you:

Don’t Take Choice Making so Seriously!

We’re all taking choice making way, waaay too seriously. Don’t! Remember: We’ve got free will which means we can ALWAYS make a new choice! Anytime. And there’s nothing wrong with doing just that.

Play Around!

Relax. Experiment. Make different choices. Play around. Try something, see what happens, and if you don’t like it, try something else instead.

Cultivate Curiosity!

Curiosity may kill cats, but as long as you use your intuition it won’t harm you. On the contrary, it will teach you all you need to know. So choose to be skeptic but totally open and highly curious. Curiosity will afford you more info, which will help you decide.

The Truth Is Your Friend

Use your curiosity to examine the background and reasons behind things – the truth. Not just the relative truths of consensus reality and the old obsolescent physical-mechanical paradigm, but the deeper, actual, more fundamental and absolute version of truth – the truth of consciousness – quantum truth, so to speak, or spiritual truth. That will help you choose like nothing else.

And, just to be clear, spiritual truth is completely unaffiliated with any and all organized religions. You won’t benefit much from having other people tell you their truth (or, to be precise, the truth they’ve been taught), you HAVE to find your own truth. Just like you can’t just take what I’m writing here at face value. Which is why you need your curiosity.

Finding the actual, quantum truth (absolute truth) not only sets us free, but fixes all problems. Image: Picture frame created with two brightly colored art nouveau bird drawings by George Barbier.

Get Conscious!

The process of finding the fundamental, spiritual, more absolute quantum truth and the process of making yourself more conscious are one and the same. It is also the process of empowerment.

The thing about unconscious/subconscious choices is, they’re disempowering because they don’t feel like your choices – they feel like something that’s “happening to you” or maybe even like something that’s “being done to you”.

Making fully conscious choices, on the other hand, is empowering. And ALL the power to choose and create your life experience rests with you.

Clean Your Consciousness!

We’ve all grown up in a not-very-conscious environment under the obsolescent physical-mechanical paradigm, so we’ve assimilated (taken in) tons of misunderstandings – about pretty much everything. This means that our (your) consciousness is filled with old, useless, painful and highly limiting old clutter and junk, and it’s time for a spring-cleaning. Which will raise your level of consciousness. Here’s the most important part of how to do that …

Learn to Let Go!

We really should have learned how to let go in school, because it’s one of the most useful life skills in existence. We can let go of anything that’s painful, unpleasant or limiting, including (but not limited to) attachments, habits, feelings, thoughts, wants, needs, and most particularly beliefs and mindsets. And we lose absolutely nothing (except pain and frustration) by doing so, on the contrary we set ourselves free.

So, teach yourself a method for letting go. Try out Byron Katie’s The Work, Lester Levenson’s The Release Technique or The Sedona Method, Morty Lefkoes The Lefkoe Method or my own The Let Go Method. Try them all, pick a couple that work for you … and USE them. A lot.

Don’t Believe Your Beliefs!

Beliefs can be let go, and you should certainly do so.

All beliefs limit our consciousness, so just let them go. Image: Photo of big, rusted metal chain links.

Why would we want to let our beliefs go?

Because they’re not the truth. Beliefs are replacements for the truth; they are just theories and software programs that we’ve created ourselves or have had transferred from someone else (e.g. our family and teachers).

All beliefs limit your consciousness. It is their nature, it’s what beliefs do.

So for every belief we let go, we gain more conscious awareness.

Which is very much exactly what we want.

Opt Out of ALL Low-Consciousness Info!

Disempowering, low-level consciousness stuff is everywhere. On the Internet, in the movies, on TV, in the magazines and newspapers, even in novels, songs and the stories we tell each other. For example, I would estimate that at least 95% of the so-called “news” in mainstream media is pure, low-level, fear-inducing crap – totally disempowering. How sad is that!

In other words, unconscious, misunderstood, fear-based crap is a huge part of our culture (no matter which culture), our minds and our consciousness.

Paying attention to such crap is not just a waste of consciousness resources, it’s actually damaging for us: we’re polluting our consciousness. Crap in, crap out, as they say, or to put that differently: Taking low-level consciousness crap in means you have crap inside of your consciousness causing mental misunderstandings, limitations and lousy states of being, as well as crap coming out again – of your mouth, pen, PC, etc. Not a pretty sight! 🙂

Time to change that! Simply opt out!

There Are Always More Choices Than You Think!

Sometimes people can only see one choice. Those are the situations where some folks will tend to think and say, “I had no choice.” This is pure bullcrap, of course.

Not only is there always a choice, there are always several more choices or options than we can presently see or think of – always! For some reason this never fails. Life/consciousness is a wonderfully flexible thing.

We may not be able to see or imagine all the options ourselves, but we can enlist the help of others to brainstorm, and we can also ask our intuition or higher self for help. And sometimes just remembering the fact that there are always more choices and options than we think is enough to unlock them in our consciousness.

Make Decisions and Choices on a High Level of Consciousness!

Our consciousness consists of lots of levels, but the more comprehensive (“higher”) the level of your consciousness you make your choices on, the better they’re going to be!

Spiritual and personal development will likely raise your consciousness in general. An even more efficient way to do that is learning to let go and then using that skill again and again.

In the moment when you’re making a decision a favorite way to ensure that you’re making it on a high(er) level of consciousness is using your intuition, because that can be a direct line to a higher level of consciousness. Learning to use your intuition is a skill. It can be taught, and you can teach yourself, too. Simply use your intuition – train it and learn to trust it.

Or, you could go on inner journeys and establish a working relationship with your so-called higher self (which is the same thing – a higher level of consciousness).

Or you could do all of the above. Either way, the higher the level of consciousness you use to make decisions and choices, the better they’re going to be.

Focus on Your Experience!

Since the physical world and everything about it is virtual and our perception of all this is relative, a focus on the physical world is an almost complete waste of resources. And one which makes us feel disempowered (and depressed), to boot, because we’re not getting what we want … a good life experience.

So make sure your awareness, energy, attention and intentions are in fact directed towards WHICH TYPES OF EXPERIENCE you are currently having and which type of experience you NOW choose to have next. THAT is where your resources need to be directed when you make choices!

Ultimately the only thing worth focucing on is our experience right now. Image: Landscape in France with mountains and trees.

What You Need to Know about CREATING

As by now you’re well aware, you are already choosing, creating and experiencing your life. Since we are currently in the throes of a major paradigm shift, moving from a physical and mechanical understanding of ourselves and the universe towards an understanding that’s based on quantum theory and consciousness, we generally don’t really understand how to use our consciousness to create reality and experience. Yet. Luckily, it’s not actually very hard in practice. In fact, we can do it using this one tool alone …


The creative part (of anything) is a bit of a mystery, but happily it seems to work all by itself, as long as you’ve cleared your consciousness of contradictory and limiting old crap (beliefs and mindsets, in particular, but also diverse types of bad habits and behaviors), and you’re using your primary creative tool: intention.

Set your intention for an experience in a clean consciousness and have it creatively manifest in your life. Image: Two red gerbera flowers in front of white marble.

Once you’ve spring-cleaned your consciousness and learned to focus your consciousness resources NOT towards the physical world but towards your experience, things tend to get fairly easy for you. You choose, set your intention, and then you follow the signs, so to speak.

This is sometimes called synchronicity, even if that concept isn’t quite clearly defined, and only describes part of what I’m talking about here.

As mentioned previously, intention is free will creatively made manifest as experience.

So, clean up your consciousness, focus properly on your experience, set your intention, and off you go, having the time of your life.

More Tools for Reality Creation and the Creation of Experience

There are other tools for creating reality and experience as well, and even if none of them are as potent as intention, some of them are quite powerful. I’ve identified about a score (20+) of them, but here I’ll just hand pick and focus on a few – the most important and powerful ones.

Openness (including Acceptance) (Saying ‘Yes’ to Yourself and Life)

The things that you intend may not come in the form that you expect, and if you’re closed off and non-accepting, you’re going miss lots of opportunities just because they don’t conform to your expectations. So please open up! If you like, you can read more about the power of being open in this article.

Attention (including Focus and Perseverance)

We all know that things tend to happen less efficiently (or not at all) if we don’t pay attention to them. The creation of experience and reality is no exception. So pay attention, focus and keep doing it. But please, do it lightly and playfully, not obsessively. Always keep your main focus on what’s important: your experience.

Health, Energy and Balance

Because you have a physical body, your health (both physical, energetic, emotional and psychological), your energy, energy levels and energy flows, as well as various types of balance in your life are not unimportant. I’m not saying obsess over those things, I’m just saying,

a) all of those things do exist (yes, including e.g. meridians and subtle energies that you can use for healing – and yes, that includes e.g. Reiki)
b) every body is different, and has different requirements.

So, experiment, find out what works for you and stick to it. (Which also means don’t skimp on anything your body and psyche needs like sleep, water, nutrients, sunlight, personal-you-time, etc.)

Simple as that.


Contrary to popular beliefs, our needs are NOT infinite in number, NOT set in stone and NOT insatiable, by any means. Also, what we ACTUALLY need tends to be something other than what we THINK we need.

There are only about eight basic needs total, and they are actually fairly malleable as well as pretty easy to fulfill. For this to become true for you, too, first you need to realize …

What Is “Enough”, Exactly?
Our perceived needs are powerful drives, motivators. So, one of the most important thing about needs is to know what constitutes “enough” for you. This is an ultra-important life skill to have.

If you don’t have this skill, you’ll be tempted to feel, think and believe that your needs are countless, boundless, interminable and never-ending. Like a bottomless pit. But they aren’t. Not at all.

All you have to do is decide on what “enough” is. Need money? How much is enough? Need shoes? How many pairs are enough? Need to read books? How many per month is enough? And so on. Be specific, make a choice, and then stick to your decision. It’s an excellent idea that makes life much, much easier.

Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs
Abraham Maslow did some excellent work regarding needs, and his final choice was a hierarchy of eight basic needs (as opposed to his early theories which featured fewer needs). These eight basic needs could be divided into three types: survival needs, social needs and self realization (self actualization) needs.

Building on this I, personally, prefer not to view it so strictly as a hierarchy, adjust the words a bit, and expand it using the following …

Eight Polarized Basic Human Needs (According to Soren Lauritzen)

1. Physical survival & reproduction/sex – vs. – death instinct & abstinence
2. Safety, comfort & predictability – vs. – unpredictability & challenge
3. Control, responsibility & freedom – vs. – no control, no responsibility
4. Recognition & a feeling of belonging – vs. – disapproval & individuality
5. Giving and contributing – vs. – receiving / getting
6. Development & full use of abilities – vs. – status quo & self limitation
7. Balance, harmony & beauty/aesthetics – vs. – imbalance, disharmony & ugliness
8. Unity, wholeness & being your soul identity – vs. – separation (non-wholeness) & ego

As you can see, each of these eight basic needs also has an opposite, which is the same need, only with the energy and the drive reversed. For example, the need or drive for physical survival has an opposite side which we sometimes call “a death wish” or something similar. And people not only desire predictability, sometimes they desire the opposite. And so on.

The point is that every conceivable need you feel is ACTUALLY one of those eight basic needs, and once you realize which one, you can give yourself that – probably in a much simpler way than you first thought.

(Oh and yes, once you’re adult, fulfilling your needs is YOUR job, nobody else’s).

All this makes having and dealing with needs SO much easier.

For every perceived need first decide what is "enough" for you, then uncover which of the eight basic needs lies behind ... and give yourself that. Image: Two red cherries with water on black backtround.


Our physical bodies are great fans of habits, our minds apparently somewhat less so, and perhaps there’s a reason for that. An open, flexible mind is certainly more useful than one that’s bogged down by old mental habits.

I’m not a fan of the words “good” and “bad” because of how extremely relative and basically meaningless they are, so I’m not going to say there are good and bad habits, but certainly there are habits which are more useful and beneficial than others. It’s fairly simple, really:

Desirable habits are the ones that strengthen and empower us, helping us open up, expand and grow while having a great experience. Getting enough sleep, drinking approx. 2+ liters of water/liquid a day, eating a varied diet, staying open and non-judgmental, letting go, being accepting, loving, playful, helpful, curious and creative, etc.

Conversely, of course …

Non-desirable habits are the ones that weaken and disempower/disenfranchise us, limit us, keep us closed down, contracted and curtailed while having a sub-optimal experience. Ingesting harmful things like alcohol, chemicals and drugs (as opposed to entheogens), any and all addictions including smoking, watching or listening to or reading low-level consciousness stuff like the so-called “news”, not respecting yourself, negative self-talk, being fearful, being aggressive, being closed off, limiting yourself with beliefs, etc.

It’s been said that to establish a (non-addictive) habit you need to repeat it for three weeks, or 21 times. That’s as good a rule of thumb as any. Conversely, all you have to do is skip one time to potentially lose the beneficial habit again.

Breaking a habit that weakens you can be as simple as making the decision and sticking to that decision; or replacing the habit with a different, more beneficial one; but you can also learn the skill of letting go and use it on the habit and whatever is keeping you in it.

Beliefs (and Mindsets)

We only feel the need to believe something when we don’t actually know what the truth is. So:

Beliefs are a replacement for the truth (reality, that-which-is).

Let most beliefs go - keep only the most open, empowering ones. Image: Alphonse Mucha art nouveau drawing of an elegant lady surrounded by flowers.

Beliefs are theories, that’s all. Interestingly, they tend to take a form that resembles software programs … for the mind. And they can be transferred from person to person, mind to mind (much like a computer virus).

Our minds are running lots of these belief-programs, and many of them are contradictory and actually conflict with each other (creating e.g. procrastination and erratic, unpredictable results). Also:

ALL beliefs are limiting. It is their very nature as replacements for reality / truth / that-which-is.

BUT, with beliefs being so much like software programs, you can both examine, edit and delete (let go of) your beliefs. And this is indeed very much a worthwhile pursuit. Let me just cut to the chase here:

The fewer beliefs you hold the better. Because each and every belief you hold limits your consciousness.


The more open, accepting and inclusive what few beliefs you actually choose to hold are, the better.

Believing something open and accepting like “anything is possible” will give you a much better life experience than believing something closed off and judgmental like “very few things are possible”.

In other words,

For the ability to make good choices and to have a good life experience, let go of as many beliefs as you can, and make sure your remaining beliefs are as open-ended, non-limiting, non-judgmental and empowering as possible.

What You Need to Know about EXPERIENCING

As mentioned, experience must be pretty darn important, why else would we be doing it so much? So what makes up an experience?

Well, first off, there has to be someone to have the experience – an identity.

This will result in some perspective / world-view or other – on everything that’s experienced.

Next, some attention or awareness is needed, because without that not very much will be experienced.

Then, there’s the choice making part using free will; and the creative part using intention – both of which we’ve already covered.

Very interestingly, there also needs to be some contrast (Example: if all you’ve ever been is totally happy, how would you know what that IS and ISN’T? The only way to know is to get some contrast in the form of unhappiness, sorrow or the like).

There are other ingredients to experience as well, but these are some of the main ones, and they can be TOOLS for us to use!

Of course, if you don’t use them, they’ll work in what seems like an automatic fashion, but in fact YOU get to choose and control all of them! The ones we haven’t looked at so far are: identity, perspective / world-view and contrast. Let’s look at those.


Who you think, feel, believe and trust you are … is a choice. It’s a choice that has a huge – and I mean a HUGE – impact on our life experience.

Why? Because our chosen identity is one of our most basic beliefs, and everything in our lives – our entire life experience – gets filtered through it. So it’s REALLY worth picking a useful and beneficial identity. Which, as it happens, is a matter of authenticity.

People asking “how to be authentic”, or “how can I be authentic”, or “how to be yourself” are often surprised to hear that the answer is to STOP trying to be anything. What’s left, then, is the real you. Being authentic, living your authentic self, isn’t so much something you DO as it is a matter of letting go … and keep letting go.

Look, we’ve all grown up somewhere and been subjected to all sorts of culture, traditions, beliefs and expectations about who and what we are … and are supposed to be. All of that is NOT who we really are! It’s just old habits, most of them based on a relatively low level of conscious awareness.

You do NOT want that defining you. Of course you can keep the nice, useful and empowering parts of it, but skip the rest. Just let it go.

That said, to make things very simple and manageable, here are four basic types of identity (self image) for you to choose from, ordered by size (how contracted or expanded they are) each with a few hints attached about what kind of life experience they’re going to give you:

Extra Small: Other People’s Expectations as Your Chosen Identity
This is your cultural identity, which includes the beliefs, traditions and the expectations of your family, friends, teachers, group, society, etc. Conforming to this can seem like a comforting default way of doing things, but in fact it isn’t easy at all because it’s so very limiting and not YOU at all. Your reality is going to be the consensus reality of your culture, with the very low level of conscious awareness that this entails (this is true of all cultures), and so you’re setting yourself up for a fairly miserable life experience.

Small: The Ego (and Physical Body) as Your Chosen Identity
This is the default cultural identity of the industrialized West. And it’s what traditional Western psychologists would have you believe is real (it’s not, of course). Our ego consists mostly of a sort of artificial intelligence which by default is fear-based, so having the ego + body as your chosen identity is also a recipe for a fairly miserable life experience.

Medium/Large: Your Essence (the “Home” Level of Consciousness) as Your Chosen Identity
The Home level of our consciousness a.k.a. our essence (or “soul” if you prefer) is an excellent choice as chosen identity, because it’s love-/consciousness-based, highly aware, very real and very much YOU, your authentic self. This is a much more expanded identity than the your cultural identity and your ego identity put together, and it’s going to going to give you a wonderful life experience. People who spend a lot of time actually BEING their essence (being Home) during their time here on Earth are sometimes called spiritually enlightened.

Extra Large: All of Life and Consciousness as Your Chosen Identity
This identity is, obviously, the biggest and most absolutely real one of all, and therefore the most pleasurable. It’s who we really are, at the most expanded (“highest”) level that’s relevant for human beings. It’s our truest identity.

It’s also a form of spiritual enlightenment, even more expanded (“higher”) than the essence / Home level of consciousness. Experiencing BEING all of life and consciousness (which of course we all actually are) is very likely the best experience you’re ever going to have as a human being.

However, in order to actually function in our physical bodies, this experience probably has to be “dialed down” to a less expanded (“lower”) level of consciousness. Somewhere between the Home level of consciousness (our essence / “soul”) and this level.

Why? Well, because at this level we ARE everything and everyone (true non duality or nondualism), which means that we aren’t anything or anyone in particular. There is no individual identity to have experiences, there’s no “experiencer” so to speak. All is one, and that’s all there is.

So having experienced this level of reality and beingness is incredibly astonishingly amazing, and all round very instructive indeed (it’s life changing), but in daily life on planet Earth we’re probably going to have to make do with approaching it from the level of Home/essence (if we so choose).

Or we can, as it were, choose to take a vacation into total oneness whenever we choose. Every day, even.

We choose who we believe we are, and benefit greatly from an expansive chosen identity. Image: Art nouveau drawing of woman looking at her reflection in water.

Which Identity Do You Choose?
Again, our chosen identity is who we think, feel, believe and trust we are. It IS a choice.

We can combine the above four basic types of chosen identity any way we want. Many people already combine their cultural identity with their ego + body identity. It’s just that this doesn’t give us a great life experience.

For a great life experience we need to choose a bigger, more expanded identity, and the Home level of consciousness (our essence or soul, our authentic self) seems like the obvious choice.

It’s hard to choose something when you aren’t sure what it is, so the quickest way to move your chosen identity to the essence / Home level of consciousness is to experience our authentic self in practice.

The two fastest ways to get some hands-on, first-person experience of our authentic self (the Home level of consciousness) are:

a) inner journeys


b) keep letting go of everything you can (thoughts, feelings, beliefs, your physical body, etc.) until you are left with what’s actually real (who you really are).

In short, though …

The more expanded and consciously aware (“bigger” and “higher”) our chosen identity, the better our life experience.

Perspective / World-view

Our world-view/perspective is more than the name would suggest. It’s how we see not just the world, but everything: Ourselves, others, the world, and consciousness/life itself, as well as the relationships between all of those.

And so it becomes clear that identity and perspective (and contrast, which we’ll get to in a moment) are closely related. As mentioned above, our chosen identity can be seen as the filter through which we experience everything, and contrast is precisely what the name suggests – the amount of contrast we need to perceive something, whereas our perspective / world view, then, can be said to be the color of that filter. Is it light and positive or dark and negative? Up to you.

For example, traveling abroad – or on inner journeys – doesn’t just give us contrast, it also changes our perspective and world-view. And it has the potential to change our chosen identity as well.

For entirely selfish reasons every organized philosophy, religion, political movement, etc. wants us to adopt their particular perspective / world-view, but if you’re reading this then odds are that these ready made perspectives / world-views won’t serve you. Neither will large parts of the overall perspective / world-view held by the culture in which you grew up.

You’re going to want to establish your own perspective / world-view.

Which probably means letting much or most of the old one go – most notably everything that’s based on fear, separation (non-wholeness), relativity and limitation. (And you’re also going to want to take an extra look at anything that’s based on the obsolescent mechanical/physical paradigm).

Which brings us to …

Basic Types of Perspective / World-view
Because of the close relationship between identity and perspective / world-view there are basically four different types:

• The perspective / world-view of your culture
• The perspective / world-view of your ego
• The perspective / world-view of your essence/soul (the Home level of consciousness/identity)
• The perspective / world-view of life as a whole / consciousness / oneness

We’ve already discarded the prefabricated cultural perspective / world-view along with all the off-the-rack perspectives / world-views of all the organized philosophies, religions, political movements, etc. All of those are extremely relative, virtual, unreal and not really worth having.

The perspective / world-view of life as a whole / consciousness / oneness is as real as it gets, and while it’s highly useful to have the ultimate experience (see below) and thus know the ultimate truth, it is admittedly a bit of a challenge to relate it to our everyday lives on Earth. All in all that leaves us with these two basic choices:

• The perspective / world-view of the ego
• The perspective / world-view of the essence/soul (the Home level of consciousness/identity)

The main point regarding the choice between these two perspectives/world-views above is the EXPERIENCE that having each of them yields:

– Choose the perspective / world-view of the ego, and you’re in for a nasty and bumpy ride, because our egos are based on fear, limitation and separation (non-wholeness), which means their perspective / world-view and their level of consciousness is very limited (“low”). The reality of the ego is highly relative (virtual / unreal), and basically not very nice to experience.

– Choose the perspective / world-view of the essence, and you’re in for a treat, because our essences are based on unconditional … love, happiness, inner peace, spaciousness, freedom and more, and have a very large perspective / world-view and an expanded (“high”) level of consciousness. The reality of the essence is more absolute (real), and very, very nice to experience.

So … which perspective do you choose?

For a better experience choose a bigger perspective / world-view. Our ego's perspective is fear based, but the perspective of our essence is love and consciousness based. Image: Art nouveau drawing of woman in front of mirror.


Do you know what a whiteout is?

It’s a situation where snow (or fog or sand) causes our visible, physical experience to be without reference points – it’s not dark, but the light is completely diffused (seems to come from everywhere), and visibility is close to zero, so the horizon has completely disappeared, and we lose all sense of position and direction (and sometimes balance, too). In that situation it is quite possible to get completely lost in, say, your own garden.


Basically because there’s no contrast. There’s nothing to relate to, no apparent relativity. (Contrast is, actually, very close to being relativity in a nutshell).

Well, THAT’S how important contrast is to us – and to our experience.

To really experience (and appreciate) daytime and light, we also need to experience the night and darkness. To really experience fun we have to also experience boredom. To know exactly what good food, good sex or good behavior are, we also need to experience what bad food, bad sex and bad behavior are. And so on.

But please note that those are examples of polar opposites. Luckily, both relativity and experience are pretty flexible, so polar opposites are not necessary. Here how it works:

Contrast: to really experience (and appreciate) something we also need to experience something ELSE. Typically it does not have to be the polar opposite, as long as it’s something DIFFERENT enough to give us contrast.

Contrast is helpful. Image: man dressed as a woman; postcard from 1900.

In other words, under normal circumstances nobody close to us needs to die and leave us in mourning just so that we can fully experience and appreciate the times when we’re happy. But we do need to experience not-at-all-happy in some form.

In the choose-create-experience-grow game of living life there’s no way to (and no reason to) avoid contrast, because it helps us experience, as well as learn and grow.

Luckily …

With enough consciousness resources at our disposal we ourselves get to choose the type and amount of contrast in our life experience.

Which also means …


The more expanded (“higher”) your level of consciousness is, the more subtle the contrast in your experience can be (the sweeter the deal you’re going to get), because you’ll experience and learn a lot from very little.

And vice versa, of course …

If you choose to let your consciousness be very influenced by fear, separation (non-wholeness, “us vs. them” / “me vs. life”) and relativity (e.g. “I/we are beautiful, good and right and you/they are ugly, evil and wrong”) then your consciousness is going to be contracted and limited – you’ll have a “low” overall level of consciousness – which means that subtleties just aren’t going to register with you. You’re going to need a lot of contrast, which can be tough. Nasty, even.

Not because you’re stupid or dense, but because the amount of consciousness resources you have access to is so limited. You actually NEED things to be rough (very contrast-y) or you may not even notice them.

So there are actually good reasons for upping your level of consciousness and choosing your own contrasting experiences. Also …

Contrast has the potential to make you a lot more accepting of, well, everything and everyone (including yourself).

In short, contrast is good for us. It helps us learn, expand and grow.

When you know how important contrast is, differences, mistakes and unexpected happenings can go from being something to fear, loathe and avoid to be being something to learn from, appreciate and celebrate! Which is a very powerful mindset indeed.

It’s all a matter of getting some contrast compared to what you’re used to.

The Ultimate Experience!

Now, that we’ve been looking in-depth at what relative reality is, and how you as a human being can create your own reality using nothing but your free will, intention, attention, energy and awareness, it is particularly funny to note that the ultimate experience is the one where you give all of that up.

Yep, that’s right.

The ultimate experience is the one where you use your free will, intention, etc. to give up your free will, intention, etc. … where you consciously choose total surrender, choose to let it all go, open up completely and just BE.

If all goes well, this can lead to the ultimate experience of oneness (cosmic consciousness): The actual experience of yourself as the consciousness which is everything, everywhere, at all times.

Yep, again, oneness a.k.a. cosmic consciousness a.k.a. experiencing the inherent wholeness of everything (including yourself) is in many ways the ultimate experience.

The Experience of Oneness, Cosmic Consciousness

Studies (by Stanislav Grof and others) show that this oneness experience tends to present itself in one of three ways:

a) experiencing the emptiness/nothingness of everything, having infinite potential
b) everything/infinite potential realized as everything, but everything being empty at its core
c) pure, unadulterated ecstatic bliss

… all of these experiences come bathed in unconditional love, unshakable inner peace, complete happiness, infinite cosmic playfulness and humor. And more. So they feel preeetty darn good.

All of which makes for the ultimate experience. Which, if you let it, is utterly life changing.

(I’ve tried it, so I know).

How to Get the Ultimate Experience?

So, in more practical terms, HOW do you get this ultimate experience?

Letting go completely or surrendering unconditionally (to life) is the best experience there is. Image: the setting sun seen through a pine tree.

Well, you can use my personal favorite of going on inner journeys; or there’s meditation; or yoga; or deep hypnosis; or brainwave entrainment, or OBEs (which stands for out-of-body experiences – yes, apparently you can train yourself to get out-of-body experiences, and I thought I’d mention them even though I tend to think they’re basically just another form of inner journeys); or you can use the very powerful method of entheogens (psychoactive substances like certain cacti, mushrooms, LSD, etc. that induce spiritual experiences); or, indeed, whatever consciousness expanding method suits your fancy.

Just be aware that there are many layers to consciousness, and limitations such as beliefs, habits or old hurts might be holding you back until you fix them – e.g. by letting them go. In other words, you may find yourself ‘semi-stuck’ on some layer or another until you’ve gotten clear on whatever it is that’s holding you back.

Yeah, so basically it’s all about opening up and expanding. Surrendering. Letting go. More and more and even more. In the end you’ll get there.


After the Ultimate Experience

Is having the ultimate experience of cosmic oneness the same as spiritual enlightenment?

Well, no, because one swallow does not a summer make. It’s pretty likely that there are issues in your consciousness and your daily life that will tend to pull you back into a more mundane state of consciousness. Don’t worry, though, you can always go back to oneness. It IS the way things actually are, after all.

But on the other hand you might just find that the state of oneness is semi-permanent for you, and that is indeed said to be one of the few sure-fire signs that a person is more or less spiritually enlightened (whatever that means).

The way I see it, what matters is your life experience. If being more or less spiritually enlightened is the perfect type of experience for you, then that’s the experience you’ll create for yourself. If it isn’t, then you won’t.

Finally, I’ve got to ask … What if the ultimate experience is only the beginning?

What if we can let go and open up even more and discover that THERE IS MORE that feels even better; maybe even INFINITELY MORE TO EXPERIENCE? What if, in fact, THERE IS NO LIMIT to what we can experience?

My own personal experiences tell me that that’s how it actually is. Currently, though, we’re human beings, living our lives here on Earth, which means that we may as well focus on making THAT a great experience – both for ourselves and for others around us.

Conclusion and Final Words

You are consciousness in a conscious universe (a.k.a. a universe made of consciousness).

You consist of many layers and so exist on many planes simultaneously, and you have the ability to create. You’re particularly skilled in the creation of experience, which you do by creating a relative and virtual reality for yourself to experience.

We humans are consciousness in a universe made of consciousness. Image: Photo of the Sunflower Galaxy.

It all takes place inside consciousness, and it’s all done using consciousness.

Only, you’re most likely not aware of all of this.

Nor do you need to be aware of it, because your subconscious and superconscious can do most of the heavy lifting, and the whole process seems to happen almost automatically. THAT is just how skilled at reality creation you are. A true wizard, who can create reality without even being aware of it.

Presently you have a physical body equipped with a sort of artificial intelligence called your ego and there are some needs to attend to, sure, but that doesn’t mean you have to use all your resources on that which is physical (and virtual).

Instead of focusing on external, physical (virtual) things you can choose to use a good bit of your energy, awareness, attention and intention on things that are a bit more real, meaningful and satisfying. Consciousness, for example, and creating a better life, and a better life experience for yourself – and others. But you certainly don’t have to.


It’s a choice, your choice. That’s what your free will is for. Choosing.

You are free to play (choose, create and experience) on whatever level of reality you want. It’s ALL experience!

Experience is probably one of the most important things in the universe. And you’re able to do it. In fact, you’re doing it all the time, including now.

Ultimately you, being consciousness, are everything and have the ability to experience anything, anywhere, in any way you like, as often as you prefer, for as long as you desire.

So: You can choose to create your own reality and experience it, too.

Or, you can go on inner journeys and experience anything, anywhere.

Or, you can choose to open up completely, let it all go (feel free to give it a try, using e.g. The Let Go Method) and experience the true wonder and awe of the infinite consciousness that you are a part of in a oneness experience.

Good luck, and please don’t forget to play around and have fun!

– – – * – – –

This is the end of the third and final part of the article trilogy. Click here to read part two again, or click here to jump all the way back to the first part.

(End-of-text divider, art nouveau, two red roses).

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