Contents of This Article (Clickable Table of Contents)
- 1 What Is The Let Go Method?
- 2 What Do You Want?
- 3 Don’t Fear the Unpleasantness, Use It!
- 4 What Lies Beneath?
- 5 Welcome Home!
- 6 What’s Real, and What Isn’t?
- 7 Who Controls Your Life Experience?
- 8 Cleaning Up Your Act – and a Lot More!
- 9 The Let Go Method – How to Do It: Examples
- 10 The Let Go Method – How to Do It: The Process
- 11 Is there Anyone for Whom the Process Will NOT Work?
- 12 Final Notes
What Is The Let Go Method?
Would you like a simple tool to help you feel better? A tool that can also be used on your unwanted thoughts, habits, needs/wants and beliefs? A tool which can even help you get a spiritual experience – of your essence or spiritual core, which I call Home (with a capital H), and which some people call soul.
Well, you’re in luck, because so did I, and during the many years I worked as a coach and guide in consciousness I ended up developing one. I call it the The Let Go Method, and I’ll teach you the basics of it right here in this article. (I have also written a couple of books about this method, but that’s a story for another time).
What Do You Want?
You might like to have a cool car, or a ton of money, or a huge house on the beach, or even the perfect lover(s), but those are just means to an end.
Here’s what we all relly want: a pleasurable life experience. We want to feel good. Be happy.
Here’s how we can get it: use any and all unpleasantness we experience as fuel towards a better life experience.
It’s that simple. It works, too. It can take you from being unhappy to being happy in five minutes. It’s extremely efficient.
Don’t Fear the Unpleasantness, Use It!
Unfortunately the actual DOING of this feels weird because in order to get the fuel we need to stop running away from it. Which is what we have been taught to do: avoid the unpleasantness. Well, we need to stop that, and start welcoming the unpleasantness instead. In fact, we need to amplify it. Get it as close to a hundred percent as we can.
Then, once we’ve amplified the unpleasantness enough, we look beneath it. What lies below the unpleasantness? What drives it, what makes it tick? (You can bet it’s something unpleasant).
Once we realize what lies beneath the original unpleasantness, we do it again: ampliy the newly realized unpleasantness to near 100%, and dig down to uncover what (new unpleasantness) lies beneath.
We keep doing this, again and again and again, until we have uncovered all the layers.
As you can see, we basically become archaeologists of our own consciousness.
What Lies Beneath?
Our consciousness is a big place, it contains a lot of stuff, including a lot of crap. And by crap I simply mean anything that isn’t actually real and true, but rather misunderstandings and lies. This crap, which comes from a lack of awareness, has settled in layers, one on top of the other. And so we dig down.
At some point we reach a point of no return. You’ll know it when you get there, because it will likely feel something like this: If I keep doing this process, I’m going to die! At this point you can rejoice, because you’re very nearly where you need to be.
So. You’ve reached the point where you feel you’re standing at the very edge of a precipice. You know that if you take one more step, you’ll fall. And die. Well, guess what? You need to take one more step. And fall.
Don’t worry, you won’t die. Sure, you’ll feel like you’re dying, but you won’t actually, physically (or mentally or emotionally or spiritually) die, just the opposite in fact.
You’ll revive yourself and also enable a change.
Needless to say, this is the most scary part of the process. You do need to take that final step over the edge, or through the Door-of-Death, or down the rabbit hole … you do need that experience that feels like ‘dying’. It’s how you get to where you need to be.
Guess what we find beneath the final layer of unpleasantness?
The answer is … Love. Freedom. Spaciousness. Inner peace. Happiness. Wholeness.
Once we reach this, most basic layer, we cannot dig down any further. We can certainly try, but all we uncover is more love, freedom, spaciousness, peace, happiness and wholeness. More and more, and even more. In fact, there’s no end to those things. Which is kind of nice.
This limitless love, peace, happiness, etc., this complete wholeness is our spiritual core, our essence. It is the truth about who we are. It is the reality which we cannot see in our daily, busy, stressful and worryfilled lives. It is the place in consciousness where we belong, and I call it Home (with a capital H), because that’s how it feels to me. (Also Home doesn’t have any overused and abused connotations the way a word like for instance ‘soul’ does). This final layer, Home, is our natural, default state of being.
What’s Real, and What Isn’t?
Love, freedom, spaciousness, peace, happiness and wholeness are the final layer for one simple reason: they are real. They are the actual, true content of our consciousness. They are what our consciousness is made of.
Pretty much everything else isn’t real; rather it’s unconsciousness, misunderstandings and lies. And we can tell the unreal from the real by how we experience each of them:
– We experience that which is real and true (love, wholeness, etc.) as very pleasant.
– We experience that which is NOT real and true (everything else) as less pleasant or unpleasant.
Our consciousness, in its natural state, is whole, at peace, free, joyful, loving and incredibly spacious. How cool is that?!
Who Controls Your Life Experience?
OK, what does all this mean? And what has it got to do with The Let Go Method?
All this means that you are in control of your life experience. You are in control of your feelings, thoughts, habits, needs and beliefs. For many of us, much of the time, it doesn’t feel like that, and so that’s one of the applications of The Let Go Method – to empower you and put you back in the driver’s seat of your life experience.
Cleaning Up Your Act – and a Lot More!
Another, very cool purpose of The Let Go Method is to enable you to experience reality – that-which-is. Which feels really good.
And, of course, a third and rather nice purpose of the Let Go Method is that you get rid of stuff that’s bothering you – you clean up your consciousness.
Each time you use The Let Go Method, you clean up a pile of unconscious junk. Once that pile is gone, you will have more attention, awareness and energy than you did before, because junk takes up those things.
In other words, you’re not just ‘cleaning up your act’, you’re cleaning up the actors, the props and the entire theatre, too.
The Let Go Method – How to Do It: Examples
By now, you’ve no doubt gotten the gist of it, but you’ll probably want to know how to do it in practice. First, let me present few examples of the type of things you might work with, and then let me show you the process in general terms.
• Example of an unwanted thought: “I think my boss hates me. Why? Because I’m not fast enough and not living up to expectations.”
• Example of an unwanted feeling: “I’m worried. Why? Because I’m moving to a new city where I don’t know anyone.”
• Example of an unwanted need/want: “I need (and eat) too much candy and ice cream. Why? Because it’s a way for me to deal with emotions.”
• Example of an unwanted habit: “I have a lousy habit of never being on time. Why? Because I hate looking a watch all the time, but I love immersing myself so much that I lose track of time.”
• Example of an unwanted belief: “I believe the world is a nasty place, that’s out to get me – I am a victim. Why? It’s probably I’m a looser.”
Okay. So. Here’s the process (you can do this alone or with an unbiased helper whom you trust) …
The Let Go Method – How to Do It: The Process
First off, there is a powerful preparatory technique you can use as a precursor to the Let Go Method. It involves temporarily ‘cleaning the slate’ so to speak. If you’re going to be working with something big or ‘heavy’ or very serious … or if you really want the experience of Home, then I recommed that you use that technique first, but describing the technique will take another article altogether, so I won’t get into it here, I’ll just jump straight to a general version of the process involved in the Let Go Method:
1. Notice some sort of unpleasantness (an unwanted thought, feeling, need/want, habit or belief). Put the thought, feeling, need/want, habit or belief into words for yourself (or for your helper); use one or a few sentences to succinctly state what’s up and why (unpleasantness, reasons and connections). (Just like the examples, above).
2. Amplify it. Make the unwanted thought, feeling, need/want, habit or belief stronger. Here’s how you do that:
– If it’s a thought or a belief, repeat it and add negative adjectives to make it worse; you can also think of worst case scenarios. Keep making the thought or belief more unpleasant.
– If it’s a feeling or a need, dial up the feeling or need to a higher level, immerse yourself completely, wallow in it. Keep making the feeling or need more unpleasant.
– If it’s a habit, keep imagining yourself performing it and making the habit more unpleasant until it takes up all your concentration.
This will have the effect of making you feel worse, obviously. But don’t worry, it’s for a good cause, and besides it’s only temporary.
3. Once you’ve dialed the unpleasantness up to maximum, ask yourself (or get your helper to ask you): “What lies beneath (or: below, or behind) this unpleasantness?” If you don’t get an answer almost immediately, it’s usually because you haven’t dialed the unpleasantness up high enough yet, which means you haven’t fully experienced what you need to experience to move on yet, so just do step 2 some more – and then ask again.
4. The answer will be a new, different kind of unpleasantness. This is what you’ll work with next, starting from step 1, so:
5. Amplify the new, different unpleasantness. Dial it up to maximum.
6. Then ask (or get your helper to ask you): “What lies beneath (or: below, or behind) this unpleasantness?”
7. Repeat steps 1 through 6 until you either …
a) … feel a sense of spontaneous release, followed by an easing of your burdens and a feeling of having freed yourself from something. Sometimes the process ends here, and this (mild) spontaneous release is the result you get – particularly if what you were working with wasn’t a big or ‘heavy’ thing, i.e. if it was something that didn’t trouble you all that much, and which you didn’t take very seriously. I think the spontaneous release comes simply as a result of having shed the clear light of conscious awareness on whatever it was that was troubling you.
b) … reach a point-of-no-return; like a line you feel you should not cross, a door you feel you shouldn’t walk through, a precipice you feel you shouldn’t step out over, a deep dark hole you feel shouldn’t drop down. If you reach this point, you’re in luck – it’s the precursor to the most powerful result you can get. So what you need to do next is gather some courage, and then do it: cross the line, walk through the door, drop down from the precipice, let yourself disappear down the dark hole. In actual time the sensation of falling, or moving towards your doom won’t last long, but subjectively it might take a while, so why not relax and enjoy the ride? (It’s perfectly safe).
8. Emerge on the other side (of the line/door/precipice/hole) and notice what it’s like there. It will be good – very pleasant. (If it isn’t pleasant you’re not done yet, then you use the unpleasantness as the next thing to use the process on). If it’s pleasant, then describe to yourself (or to your helper) what you’re experiencing. Use a good deal of detail and remember to give yourself lots of time to enjoy your experience.
9. Now that you’ve arrived on the other side and you are experiencing the truth of things (a more absolute and real version of reality), pick up your original unwelcome thought, feeling, need/want, habit or belief and examine it in the light of your present experience. Tell yourself (or your helper) the actual truth about it. Notice what happens when you do.
10. Now that you see the truth about your original unpleasantness, choose to let it go.
Addendum 1: If you get stuck, use the thought of being stuck (or your feeling of being stuck) as the feeling/thought to work with.
Addendum 2: If you get to a point where you cannot feel/think anything, use that emptiness as the feeling/thought to work with.
That’s it. That wasn’t so hard, was it? Okay, if you reached the point where you thought you might die, it was probably scary for a while, but even that feeling passed – to be replaced with something infinitely better.
Is there Anyone for Whom the Process Will NOT Work?
I have tried the Let Go Method with a large number of very different people. Some were enthusiastic, others were highly sceptic. The process worked for all of them – I have yet to meet someone for whom it doesn’t work.
There IS one caveat, though, one admonition or stipulation: Your experience will be colored by your underlying assumptions and beliefs. This is particularly important to remember when it comes to your experience of your essence, spiritual core or most basic nature or identity, the state of being I call Home. Here’s an analogy for what I mean:
Think of Home as a bright, warm, nurturing and loving star, and think of your underlying negative and limiting beliefs and assumptions (about yourself, life and this star) as pairs of sunglasses. Each such limiting belief you hold equals one pair of sunglasses that you are wearing. If you hold two limiting beliefs, you’re wearing two pairs of sunglasses on top of each other; if you hold three limiting beliefs, you’re wearing three pairs of sunglasses … and so forth. For each pair of sunglasses, you see the star more dimly.
This means, for each limiting belief or assumption about yourself, life and Home (your basic identity, your essence), your experience of Home (and of truth and reality in general) will be weaker, less intense, less wonderful.
Hence, examining your beliefs and assumptions – and perhaps letting them go – may be an excellent idea.
The first time you use the Let Go Method, it likely to take some time – up to half an hour, maybe, or even the better part of an hour. Once you get the hang of this simple process, though, you can do it really fast – a few minutes will be all you need for minor things.
And even though our consciousness is infinite, and each of us is housing a lot of old crap in it, the amount of junk is still finite, so after using the Let Go Method regularly for a while you will not only start looking forward to the experience of ‘dying’ because of what comes after, you’ll also be able to detect a clear difference in your overall daily well-being.